創作內容

6 GP

The BRO code(21-30)

作者:非等閒之輩│2012-08-30 00:38:59│巴幣:12│人氣:324
Article 21
A Bro never shares observations about another Bro's smoking-hot girlfriend. Even if the Bro with the hot girlfriend attempts to bait the Bro by saying, “She's smoking-hot, huh?” A Bro shall remain silent, because in this situation, he's the only one who should be baiting.

永遠不要對麻吉超火辣的女友評頭論足。即使是坐擁正妹的那個麻吉,企圖用“她超正的吧?”這種疑問句來引誘你開口。你也一定要保持沉默,因為在這種狀況下,你才是一直被引誘的那個。


Article 22
There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a Bro.
沒有明文規定說女人不可能跟男人成為麻吉。

Women make excellent Bro. Why? Because they can translate and navigate the confusing and contradictory whims that comprise the Chick Code.
女人完全可以成為男人的最讚的麻吉。為什麼?因為她們可以把令人困惑和完全矛盾的突發奇想,轉化為一本《姐妹法則》。

Q:DO CHICKS REALLY HAVE THERIR OWN CODE?
真的有所謂的《姐妹法則》嗎?

A:Yes, I'm afraid so. One morning, just before slipping out the door while my hostess was in the shower, I happened upon a copy of the rumored tome. I didn't have time to flip much past the pink bedazzled cover, but here are some of the phrases I remember seeing on the frilly pages within:

恐怕是的。某個早晨,趁我一夜情的妞在洗澡時,我準備悄悄溜走。可在出門前,我偶然發現了傳說中的《姐妹法則》。書的封面粉紅得讓人眼花繚亂,我時間不多沒翻幾頁,但我扔記得在鑲邊的頁上看到的那幾條:
1、A chick shall not sleep with another chick's ex-boyfriend, unless she does.
絕不能跟其他姐妹的前男友上床,如果真的做了,那就算了。

2、A chick never pay for anything. Ever.
從不買單。絕不。

3、If two chicks get into a fight, they shall make catty remarks and pretend to ignore each other, rather than simply stripping down and wrestling it out.
如果姐妹倆吵架,她們應該用惡毒的語言攻擊對方,並把對方當隱形人,更不是簡單地把對方衣服扒光打一架後就重歸於好。

4、If a chick hears a chick-empowerment song like “I Will Survive,” she shall stop whatever she's doing, grab another chick's hand, and shriek the lyrics at the top of her lungs.
如果聽到一首激勵女人心的歌曲,比如《我會活下去》(註1),她應該立馬放下手頭上的事情,然後抓住另一位姐妹的手,用最大的力氣把歌詞唱出來。

5、A chick may get a dog as a pet, but only if it fits in her mailbox.
可以養狗,但狗的大小僅限於能塞進自家郵箱。

6、If two chicks are wearing the same outfits, each retains the right to accidentally spill a drink on the other.
如果姐妹倆不幸撞衫,那麼各自都可以假裝不巧,把飲料灑在對方身上。

7、A chick shall not operate a motor vehicle in a safe manner.
開車時,請勿安全駕駛。

8、A chick has a free pass to slut it up on Halloween.
在萬聖節時,要穿得越騷越好。


註1:1979年,Gloria Gaynor所演唱的「I will survive」描述失戀女子見到狠心分手前男友時的心路歷程,由於其歌詞刻劃深刻、動人心弦,而成為家喻戶曉的流行歌曲,至今仍不斷被改編、翻唱。可開啟中文字幕



Article 23
When flipping through TV channels with his Bros, a Bro is not allowed to skip past a program featuring boobs. This includes, but is not limited to, exercise shows, women's athletics, and on some occasions, surgery programs.
麻吉一起看電視時,在轉台的過程中,凡是涉及到養眼的畫面,一律要停下來觀看。例如:健身節目,女子體育節目,以及某些外科手術節目。

Article 24
When wearing a baseball cap, a Bro may position the brim at either 12 or 6 o' clock. All other angles are reserved for rappers and the handicapped.

帶棒球帽的時候,帽簷只可以朝正前方或者正後方。別的任何戴法皆為Rap歌手和殘疾人專屬的。

Article 25
A Bro doesn't let another Bro get a tattoo, particularly a tattoo of a girl's name.
不能讓兄弟去紋身,特別是要把一個女人的名字紋身上時,更要極力阻止。

The average relationship between a man and a woman lasts eighty three days. The relationship between a man and his skin lasts a lifetime and must be nurtured, because as we all know, the skin is the largest and second most important organ a man has.

男人和女人的愛情平均維持天數為83天,而男人和他的皮膚則是一輩子的。因為正如我們所知,皮膚是男人身上最大和第二重要的器官,所以不但在一起的時間長,而且還要悉心照料。














Article 26
Unless he has children, a Bro shall not wear his cell phone on a belt clip.
除非你是奶爸,否則不可以把手機別在腰間

Article 27
A Bro never removes his shirt in front of other Bros, unless at a resort pool or the beach.
除非是在泳池邊或者海邊,否則不可以在其他兄弟面前脫掉上衣。

COROLLARY: A Bro with a coat of fur on his back keeps that thing covered at all times, even at a resort pool or the beach. Sorry, Bro.

推論:如果有兄弟背後毛很多,即使在泳池衣服也要一直穿著。抱歉啦,兄弟

Article 28
A Bro will, in timely manner, alert his Bro to the existence of a girl fight.
碰上女-女互毆,要及時通知兄弟前來圍觀
A Bro must, in timely manner, communicate the possibility of fisticuffs between two humans of the female variety (henceforth "girl fight"), in an effort to make possible and probable that another Bro or Bros can partake in observation. A "timely manner" is open to interpretation based on the initial Bro's viewing and processing of the potential feminine conflagration. Said Bro must use any and all methods of media distribution at his disposal, including but not limited to: telecommunications, elbow nudging, carrier pigeons, fiber optics, shouting, postcards, and telepathy. If an informed Bro is unable to witness the girl fight firsthand, the spotter Bro is responsible for documenting and relating details of the girl fight via pictures, video, or, barring any other reasonable method, interpretive dance and/or pantomime.

簡略翻譯:
        看到 girl fight的情況下,一定要盡可能即時通知麻吉過來觀戰。萬一麻吉無法到場觀戰,那麼用smartphone拍照或錄起來,寄給麻吉~!

      請上youtube關鍵字:girl fight,嘿嘿
Article 29
If two Bros decide to catch a movie together, they may not attend a screening that begins after 4:40 pm. Also, despite the cost of savings, they shall not split a tub of popcorn, choosing instead to procure individual bags.

如果兩個兄弟決定一起看電影,那他們一定要看4點40前的場次。爆米花要各買各的,即便這樣比較浪費錢,也不可以二人共享一桶

Article 30
A Bro doesn't comparison shop.
買東西不用貨比三家
引用網址:https://home.gamer.com.tw/TrackBack.php?sn=1722242
All rights reserved. 版權所有,保留一切權利

相關創作

留言共 5 篇留言

Mr.三月兔
想起了Ted的妓女紋身...哈哈!

08-30 01:00

非等閒之輩
[e12]08-30 10:10
小步步
我都跟朋友共享一桶爆米花....而且都看午夜場......

08-30 09:27

非等閒之輩
還沒"完工"你偷看!!![e17]08-30 16:04
藍鬍子老爹
更新了

08-30 18:38

非等閒之輩
ㄏㄏ。女孩打架超心機低說,對嗎??08-30 18:40
藍鬍子老爹
要扯個衣服www

08-30 18:41

非等閒之輩
+抓頭髮,不過抓頭髮超痛地說08-30 18:42
小步步
看你的文章,英文會進步。

08-30 21:57

非等閒之輩
以後都改原文好了08-30 22:04
我要留言提醒:您尚未登入,請先登入再留言

6喜歡★ray75112 可決定是否刪除您的留言,請勿發表違反站規文字。

前一篇:第100號創作:史上最被... 後一篇:奧本山大亂鬥(上)...

追蹤私訊切換新版閱覽

作品資料夾

Blueviolet00喜歡小說的大家
最近去參加popo的徵文比賽,歡迎到那裡看看我的小說! https://www.popo.tw/books/746420看更多我要大聲說4小時前


face基於日前微軟官方表示 Internet Explorer 不再支援新的網路標準,可能無法使用新的應用程式來呈現網站內容,在瀏覽器支援度及網站安全性的雙重考量下,為了讓巴友們有更好的使用體驗,巴哈姆特即將於 2019年9月2日 停止支援 Internet Explorer 瀏覽器的頁面呈現和功能。
屆時建議您使用下述瀏覽器來瀏覽巴哈姆特:
。Google Chrome(推薦)
。Mozilla Firefox
。Microsoft Edge(Windows10以上的作業系統版本才可使用)

face我們了解您不想看到廣告的心情⋯ 若您願意支持巴哈姆特永續經營,請將 gamer.com.tw 加入廣告阻擋工具的白名單中,謝謝 !【教學】